Inquisitive.me

Imagine someone comes up to you with a little monkey on their arm and hands you that monkey. What do you do?

You would probably look confused at first and ask the other person what you should do with the monkey. “Just take it.”, could be their response. You would for sure decline that offer. After all, you have no idea how to handle a monkey.

When someone approaches you with a problem, what are you going to do? Do you take on the problem or do you turn it down, like the monkey?

Far too often, we try to solve other people’s problems. We accept other people’s monkeys even though we have no clue about monkeys. We don’t know how they live or what they have experienced. And yet, we accept their monkeys.

Especially, as a physical therapist we can easily fall into that trap. Patients come into our practice and expect that we take care of their monkeys. They count on you to resolve their problems. They hand you their monkey. Even though, you don’t know the whole story. Still, you start throwing solutions at them. But wouldn’t it be better to foster their ability to solve problems so they can handle challenges independently in the future?

It can also be applied to other situations. For example, if you are a parent and your child has a problem at school, whether with classmates or teachers, avoid solving the problem for them by approaching the teacher or complaining to the principal about the classmate. Instead, help them develop their problem-solving skills.

Or maybe you’re that one friend who always tries to solve everyone else’s problems. While your intentions may come from a place of care and kindness, constantly taking on other people’s issues can be emotionally and mentally exhausting. It’s not your job.

Understanding this is one thing — but how do you actually apply it? Let’s dive into how you can put it into practice.

🧪 Let’s Experiment

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Give that monkey back — empower others to find their own solutions while you conserve your energy.

Instead of jumping in with answers or fixing their problems, try experimenting with questions that help them explore their own path:

• How did you handle this before? What worked, what didn’t?
• What ideas have you already tried or thought about?
• If a friend were in your shoes, what would you suggest?
• When faced with a similar challenge, how did you feel about the results?

These questions invite them to discover their own solutions, boost their confidence, and keep your energy focused where it counts.

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Keep it simple, stay curious, and keep learning—you’ve got this.

Take care,

Carina 🦊