Inquisitive.me

I’m guilty. Right now, I’m one of them — and I hate it.

A few weeks ago, things were different. I was mindful. When I needed a break, I’d grab a book, write something, or learn a new skill. I’d use my phone with intention, sticking to clear limits. Just like back in the day when my mum only allowed us an hour of TV.

But lately? Work stress, moving, and a million little tasks have drained my motivation. When I get 20 or 30 minutes of free time, I just don’t feel like diving into a book or learning something new. My tired brain craves the easy dopamine hit instead.

You’ve probably guessed it — I’m talking about smartphone use.

On average, people worldwide spend over 4 hours a day on their phones. That’s 100 hours a month — or 12 years of your life. And most of that time? Mindlessly scrolling TikTok, Instagram, or YouTube, forgetting almost everything within 30 minutes.

The scariest part? We don’t even realize how much time we lose. Kevin Holesh, creator of the screen-time tracking app Moment (before Apple made it standard), found that people dramatically underestimate their screen time. Fun experiment: think of how many minutes you’re on your phone each day… now double it. That’s probably closer to reality.

Some more eye-opening numbers: we pick up our phones about 58 times a day. I bet most of us don’t even think about our loved ones that often!

Ever wonder why TikTok videos or Instagram Reels are so short? Our attention span is down to 8 seconds. A goldfish clocks in at 9. Let that sink in — we’re officially easier to distract than a goldfish. Joke’s on us.

Our phones don’t just steal time — they mess with our sleep. About two-thirds of adults deal with chronic sleep deprivation. Poor sleep affects cardiovascular health, mood, and even weight (sleep less, crave more food, and when we’re glued to a screen while eating, our brains don’t even register fullness). Not to mention the links to anxiety, depression, and FOMO.

So why are these devices so addictive?

First, they flood our brains with dopamine, lighting us up like a Christmas tree — so naturally, we want more, just like any addiction. Second, we’re losing the ability to just be with our thoughts. That alone time? Vital. Our brains need it to process emotions, generate ideas, and make sense of everything we take in. Without it, anxiety and depression creep in.

Think about it: what’s the first thing you do while waiting for a bus? Standing in line? When your friend heads to the bathroom? Can we even sit with our own thoughts for 30 seconds anymore? Honestly, it’s concerning.

I came across a fascinating experiment from Stanway School in Essex, England. Students ditched their phones for 21 days. At first, boredom hit hard — one kid even said, “The last resort is me having to read a book.” (As a book nerd, that one stung.) But soon, they became more active, more social (with the real world!), slept better, focused better, felt less anxious — and actually enjoyed not being constantly interrupted by their phones.

With our phones, we’ve become like Pavlov’s dogs. But instead of drooling at a bell, we grab our phones at every ping — which might be even worse. We’re forgetting how to make eye contact, read expressions, or truly connect with people. Some kids are missing out on these skills altogether, watching parents stare at screens instead of faces. That impacts focus, problem-solving, and even language development.

I’ll never forget meeting a 3-year-old who watched TV 12 hours a day. The boy struggled to walk properly — tiptoeing everywhere, couldn’t hold eye contact, and had an attention span of about 4 seconds, grabbing one toy after another every few seconds. It was heartbreaking.

I’ve felt it myself — that constant pull, the craving for quick dopamine. But there are simple ways to regain control. Here’s what I’ve tried.

🧪 Let’s Experiment

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Your attention is precious — protect it.

We all know how easy it is to get sucked into mindless scrolling. The good news? Small, intentional changes can make a big difference.

🎯 Try This:

• Use built-in tools like Digital Wellbeing (Android) or Screen Time (Apple) to set daily limits. For example, I limit Facebook and Instagram to 20 minutes max—after that, the app locks for the day.
• Keep your phone out of sight. Leave it in another room or somewhere you won’t be reminded to check it.
• Put your phone on silent. I’ve done this since I first got a smartphone; at one point, I even muted calls.
• Keep smartwatch notifications off. Nothing on your wrist is truly urgent — if it is, they’ll call.

🧠 Final Thought:

Protecting your focus isn’t about strict rules or willpower alone. It’s about designing your environment so distractions have less power over you. Even small steps — a phone out of sight, notifications off — can give you back hours of your life, energy for learning, and space to think

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Keep it simple, stay curious, and keep learning—you’ve got this.

Take care,

Carina 🦊